Monday, July 12, 2010

My Reviews of Various Fuck-Swings

F-22 Rapture: Erotic Dominance Fighter
Despite it's title, your basic entry-level model. Simple design, washable and as easy to install just using the mounts for hanging plants April left.

Captain Fantasy's Frigging Rigging
Oh yeah. Something could happen here. Definitely.

Apex Dragonrider

Propriety pulley system gives "superior impulse" and dampens unwanted spin. Excellent design and specs. Would love to know how this actually performs.

The Right-Stuff Zero-G Sextronaut Trainer
Great reviews, but notoriously hard to master. Not sure if I can really use/need the full 360 rotation. Really turned on by the manual's description of "full power landings" and "no stall pitch and roll," but honestly quite stymied by actual assembly, tired, went to bed had to look for a job tomorrow.

EZ-Lover Shover
Lower quality product with less give and elasticity. Seems to hold one person okay.

Bondage King's Sextra Supreme Tie-Up Trapeze for Fulsome Slaves
Not really comfortable or clear with all the straps. Also, found myself crying for some reason.

Rumid's Exstasy Webbing
Fairly generic remake of the discontinued Zodiac Wall-Climber. Stringy, weak bungees have little or no response. A total disappointment. Reminds me old stretched out bras my mom used to wear around the house. Why didn't she ever throw anything away?

The Red Baron
A good fit for an import, with comfortable padding. Actually sat in this one for a while, imagining myself diving out of the sun. Okay for watching TV, amusing the cat. Left it up as the gentle rocking helps me get back to sleep.

Sunset Superman
This is it. Black and smooth. I set this one up on a ladder. Incredible acceleration. Feels so good I never want to take it off. I could catch some serious air in this thing.

She was wrong about me, you know.

1 comment:

  1. What about the Gyno-Glider with stirrups for your doctor fantasies? It comes with a complete set of vibrating "tools."